Roma 8:28

Untung sejak kecil ga kaya-kaya amat, jadi naturally hidup ga penuh tuntutan. Harus makan di sini makan di situ, punya ini punya itu.

Untung dulu pas SD ga punya HP bagus, jadi kerjaannya dengerin radio rohani. Dan berguna banget untuk hidup saat ini.

Untung dulu ga lulus Tarnus. Coba lulus, pasti makin jarang komunikasi sama orang tua di tahun pertama. Jarang pulang, padahal papa tinggal sebentar di dunia.

Untung dulu nilai UTS Fisika Dasar 1 44, kalo engga mungkin gabakal mau pemuridan wkwk.

Untung dulu depresinya pas ngerjain TA, ga kebayang kalo pas udah kerja atau pas lagi sibuk kuliah. Gimana cara nangis di tengah-tengah dosen lagi ngejelasin?

Untung dulu Monita ga lulus SBMPTN di tahun pertama. Kalo Monita lulus di ITB siapa yang nemenin mama pas sakit di Jogja?

Untung dulu putus, sekarang dapet Gembala Terbaik. Wkwkw *peace*

Untung dulu sempet depresi bentar, jadi sekarang ngerti harus gimana kalo berhadapan dengan adik PA yang mengalami hal sama.

*

Bisa jadi keburukan hari ini adalah kebaikan untuk beberapa tahun ke depan. What’s your Rome 8:28?

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Gombal and Sweets

Biar isi blog ini gacuma yang serius-serius dan sedih-sedih. Ku baru tau guys kalo kami berdua cukup punya keahlian dalam hal ini. Kalo udah ga tahan baca di close aja ya. Jangan sampai muntah. Hahaha.

*
(Di suatu hari di atas motor)

H: Yah macet

M: Gapapa lah

H: Kok gapapa?

M: Iya biar lebih lama

*
(Di suatu hari di Pangsit Mi Palu)

M: Aku baru mikir, doa abang kenceng juga ya

H: Kenapa bisa?

M: Yaa sampe bikin aku putus, dua kali bahkan.

*
(Waktu nganter pulang abis ketemu bocah-bocah)

H: Duh ngantuk nih

M: Ntar jangan ngebut loh

H: Lah bukannya cita-citamu mati barengan sama abang?

M: Bukan sekarang, bang. Maksudnya nanti kalo abang balik dari nganterin aku. Kalo sekarang kan aku bisa ingetin. Kalo ntar siapa yang ingetin?

*
(Chatroom)

H: Kayaknya abang mau resign nih

M: Laaahh trus mau ngapainn

H: Mau sama kamu

*
(Entah dimana)

H: Hari ini baju kamu bagus Mel

M: Kenapa emang?

H: Lebih feminim, seneng aja liatnya.

M: Oh.

H: Eh kok muka kamu jadi merah?

*
(Chatroom, kulagi ngechat sesuatu yang agak ga penting sementara abang lagi on flight)

M: Duh kok pikiranku banyak mikir ga penting gini ya

M: Eh gadeng ada satu yang penting

M: Abang

H: Kamu bikin abang diliatin petugas bandara wkwk

M: Kenapa emang?

H: Soalnya abang senyamsenyum sendiri

*
(Abis dari ngambek di Losari)

M: Tahan emang punya TH kayak gini?

H: Lah justru abang seneng

M: Kenapa bisa?

H: Rapuh kan, jadi berharga untuk dilindungi

Aku Adalah Anak Gembala (Part 5)

Ga salah baca kok. Emang Part 5. Iya, biar seru kaya Star Wars yang film nya ga urut.

Gadeng, sebenernya karena aku lebih pengen nulis pengalaman yang baru-baru ini terjadi aja. Soalnya berkesan banget. Dann semua hal berkesan ini dimulai dari beberapa hari sebelum IC Makassar kemarin. Eh maksudku expected-to-be-IC kemarin. Yes, IC nya batal.

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Aku adalah Anak Gembala (Part 1)

Hai guys. Post ini adalah janjiku ke puluhan orang yang nanya : Ngapain kerja di Makassar?,  yang biasanya cuma kujawab: Panjang ceritanya om/tante/mbak/kak/ko/ci/bang/dek.

Mungkin udah agak basi yah haha udah lewat setaun ini. Bodo amat. Mending telat daripada enggak sama sekali kan.

Yuk mulai.

*

Well, om/tante/mbak/kak/ko/ci/bang/dek, semua dimulai saat aku KP tiga tahun lalu. Udah lama banget yah? Iya emang ini bakal kayak Tersanjung, berepisode-episode. Ok lanjut. Continue reading

30 Reasons to stay alive until next month

Breath in. And out. There maybe some reasons that make you want to leave this life sooner that it should be, which also happened to me several days ago (and honestly still haunt me until now).

People may say: hey don’t you have decent house to live? Isn’t your daughter lovely? Don’t you earn more than me? Don’t you live in a peaceful country without those bombs fired up everyday?

Screw people. Sometimes life meaning doesn’t relate to your earning, your grades, even your relationship. Sometimes it’s not about ungratefulness. You have been very grateful for everything, yet your soul is longing for the perfect place where you could remove all the pain inside.

But sometimes the cloud is just hanging there, unmoved, dark, and cold. Happiness is a delusion, and all you want to do is to end everything.

Surely several days are brighter than the others. You just have to wait for the cloud to move, well maybe slowly.

And through the dark times, you need reasons to stay. At least until next month.

For me, the list goes on like this:

1. Infinity War will be on theater April 27th. Who could miss Robert Downey and Benedict Cumberbatch in one scene?

2. I should attend Monika’s graduation ceremony on October (hopefully)

3. There is planned vacation on June. Surely will be a great time to spend this life

4. The cashier of my company still needs my help for operating Excel

5. Our company’s project is done in April. A celebration will be prepared. After all this hardwork, I need to get the pay off right?

6. Apostolic Training is held on the end of March

7. I have enrolled to a Zumba class. If I die today, I’ll loss 150k

8. There is Bible resume that need to be done until end of year

9. I have 42 mio that should be multiplied

10. I haven’t build my business yet

11. There is debt to be paid

12. I want to see someone’s smile each day

13. I contribute in that smile also

14. I haven’t enrolled to master degree

15. There are starving people in other half of this world that need help

16. Somebody has to monitor the company project’s progress

17. I haven’t gone abroad

18. If I die, I’ll be the first of my friend, and probably not the last.

19. I have to monitor these lil’ brats so that they don’t screw up their lives

20. I want to go to Bira before I die

21. I should climb a mountain also

22. I haven’t told my big family about Jesus

23. Surely I’ll leave sadness among my family and friends if I die

24. And probably my sisters will have eating disorder after that

25. I have paid 500k for this month’s room rent

26. I haven’t gone to Dufan

27. I have several best friends, and I want to see them reach their goals, oh, and also to attend their wedding!

28. I am not rich yet

29.  I am not rich yet

30. Makassar is not finished yet.

Yeah that’s for me. How about you?

Robot Baperan

Born as an introvert and thinking person, expressing feeling is something unfamiliar to me.

Kalo diinget-inget, cuma ada 3 perasaan yang gue pernah rasakan: senang, sedih, dan sedikit marah. Cowok banget sebenernya. Dan emang temen gue banyakan cowok juga sih *trus kenapa*

Tapi sejak di Makassar keseimbangan hormon gue berubah. Pemuridan di sini beda bener. Kayak ngurusin anak asli. Ngajarin olah data TA, bantu nerjemahin tugas mereka, ngediktein tata cara praktikum. Deh.

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Fog

Some say grief is like cloud

They come and cover the sun

So you might not feel the warm

But no

Grief is like fog

It inhibits you to see everything else
Grayness

Cold

Despair

Meaningless

When your life is tied up onto a stick

And now it is taken away

Aren’t you feel like floating on the ocean?

To grief is to embrace aloneness

Because only little can comprehend

And you could not blame anyone

But through grief one can understand

That he is a winner

Of that single battle

*

Hey, fog will be lifted up

You’ll see beauty once more
.

.

.

Just wait, patiently.



Makassar, 11 months after